Spider Attack i’m the Ant
I was walking minding my own business when it happened a spider jumped out in front of me.It stered at me for long time and the it ran around me with it’s little speed legs I could’t ever see it comeing. as the spider ran around me he sang a song and it goes like this “RUN RUN AROUND THE ANT I’M GETTING DIZZY STOP STAY HAIRY ANT .I was wrapped in this white thing called a web.I was really sticky I was trapped under the wed .I was trying to get out but I couldn't the web was too strong and sticky . After a while i go really exhausted and then spider zoomed around me again another layer of sticky wed to tried to get out of .
.All of a sudden the spiders daddy jump out of nowhere and eat him. The spider dad had a really hair beard to be honest it looked pricey scary .I feel so scared that i was going to be next.But instead it look at the camera man and just stared at him for a long long time and then he just hopped away.But I was still there struggling to get out of the web.Couple of minutes later was all alone trying stilt to get out of the wed and i did. I ran as fast as i could all the way back to my house. I had to walk a long way because i was in the middle of the desert.After a long long walk through the desert i finally found the city.as I was walking on the foot parf and i neally got stod on bye lots of people I finlly found my home . “i’m so happy to be home” the ant thought to himself.I never gave up on get away from the spiders.
success: u have taken a lot of risks with word choice and chosen mostly the right word in the right place
ReplyDeletetarget: a little more variety with your sentence beginnings e.g. adverbs, action, sound ...
student response: